Thursday 20th August-2009:
(Note: first I'm sorry that my posts are posted here late than their actual date, thats why I write the actual dates before every late post).
Everything seems getting better and better than yesterday and the day before. I saw A.G and as I greeted coldly and as if A.G was no none or as if we weren't that close, I could feel that A.G was confused and stoned. I felt a lot of relief doing this!
something really irritated me that day or not only that day, but since forever. I just didn't learn to respond or accept compliments, I just can't, you can't believe how hard it is for me. Don't get me wrong but sincere compliments loosen my heart and give me some tickling I crave from time to time. But still I can't respond and I can't seem to accept them from a lot of people...serious problem,no?
Well today I've been called "Hot" not less than three times and god knows how I felt as much as I was excited and content of the compliment I was also feeling really disturbed and twice disturbed at how to reply, That I settled down saying absolutely nothing (sometimes I change topics!).
Just the image of two or three people at the same time showering me with compliments when I see them really is very very hard to me.I like compliments, a lot! But when they are Short, Sweet, and Sincere. Flattery is one of my secret weaknesses, and it is a double-edged sword for me. If it was too much or fake (I can spot those too!) they do me the negative effect; the disturbing effect that makes me immobile. While the other is just the opposite! When someone follows the "3 magical S's" it melts my heart and that person ends up scoring points with me. It proves the saying that says "Flattery will get you anywhere with a Libra!".
So I was wondering what shall I say to those compliments? The kind that leaves you speechless and disturbed, the bad ones, how to respond? Kindly please post in the comments section your ideas (anonymously if you want)
showering me from every direction
As I stare at it in surprise
I stand there quiet immobile
My heart beats audible
My tongue tied cold
Scanning it upside down
I can sense its sincerity
I felt good but unshaken
though it was sweet and faithful
every time it shed some light
on my fathomable part
mortified,hot young bitch
Laughing at you when you gush
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